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Sean Leary

If You’re A Human Being Living On Earth, You Need To Read This

Welcome to the column for all carbon-based life-forms. If you breathe oxygen, this is for you. And if you live on a planet, especially Earth, well, then, you’ve come to the right place. Sorry, but I’m just following the new trend in advertising: casting as absurdly wide a net as possible. Products used to be […]

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COULD `THE FORCE’ BECOME A RELIGION?

Could “May the Force be with you” someday be more than a T-shirt slogan? Might it one day become the climactic phrase of a religious ceremony?   According to Hollywood lore, when the first “Star Wars” film became an outrageous success, George Lucas’ ambitious friend Francis Ford Coppola suggested that Lucas try to turn the […]

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Was David Bowie An Alien?

Ever wonder what music made by an extraterrestrial might sound like? Apparently, kind of like this: “Let’s dance put on your red shoes and dance the blues…”   Which, if you play it backwards, sounds like this:   “Dance let’s shoes red your on put blues the dance and laser beam cattle rectums. . . […]

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Why Do So Many Blues Musicians Have The Nickname “Little?”

You’ve heard the expression, ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer. Well, ask several stupid questions, and get several stupider answers. Case in point: Q: Why do so many blues musicians, like Little Milton, etc., have the nickname “Little?” A: Because many blues musicians are descended from Oompa-Loompas. Blues music actually began with Oompa […]

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The Secret To Great School Pictures? Buttcheeks.

It’s that time of year again, and if you have kids in elementary school, you know exactly what I mean. School pictures time. That’s right, that time when you get your kids all dressed up and tidied up and get their hair looking perfect and their outfits looking spot on and send them to school, […]

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Can You Really Become Addicted To Videogames

“Fortnite.” “Overwatch.” “God Of War.” Know anyone who plays those games? Know people who say, or demonstrate by their actions, that they’re “addicted” to those games? Think they’re exaggerating? They might not be. It sounds like a sci-fi scenario, but from a logical standpoint, you could become addicted to video games. Much like anything else […]

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FINALLY, An Answer To The Eternal Question: Do Ghosts Fart?

The following column is excerpted from Sean Leary’s upcoming humor book, Do Vampires Poop? And Other Incredibly Important Questions, available in bookstores worldwide in September. By Sean Leary Ever walk into your house after you’ve been away, or walk into a room and notice a strange smell? Of course, once you do, you have to […]

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